


you are my home

by starrystars



Series: of officer meng and gang boss tangyi [2]
Category: HIStory3 - 圈套 | HIStory3: Trap
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Heavy Angst, M/M, Mentions of Blood, Romance, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-24
Updated: 2019-05-24
Packaged: 2020-03-13 14:20:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,383
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18942730
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starrystars/pseuds/starrystars
Summary: a home, a sanctuary, a paradise, where tangyi and meng shaofei will live happily together.





	you are my home

**Author's Note:**

> i was watching a beautiful tangfei video by falxCieStudios, and i'm really inspired to write this. please watch this video [here!](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0UKNk_Nftvg)
> 
> everything about the video was spectacular. the emotions i felt when i watched it, i tried to incorporate it in this story. even the song used was amazing. the video is really a work of art. she is such an amazing editor in general. thank you for giving me the permission to write a story inspired by your video, love :)
> 
> this is so badly written istg. unbeta-ed. will edit this story later on.
> 
> enjoy, x

Emptiness.

 

The spaces in Tangyi’s heart was void from any form of emotion. It has always been empty, has always been so hollow and desolated. He has spent his childhood all alone, only the memories of his biological mother keeps him going. But when she passed away, the emptiness intensifies. Sometimes he is sure that being alone is better than to be in a crowd.

 

_A home_.

 

Tangyi has never have a place he can really call home.

 

His adopted father hated him, resent him and thus he decided to run away. He ran away from his so called home.

 

Boss Tang found him and Hongye in the alleyway, his sweatshirt covered in dirt and his hands were busy holding the wooden box his biological mother gave him.

 

Boss Tang was the first to give him a hug. Boss Tang was the first to celebrate his birthday, and Boss Tang was the first to give him a home.

 

A home where Boss Tang, Brother Daoyi, Hongye and he lives.

 

They are his happiness, staying with them makes him happy. Finally, Boss Tang has filled his usual empty heart with his love, his affection and just with his presence in Tangyi’s monochrome life.

 

Everything turns colorful the moment he stepped into his new home.

 

But when Boss Tang died in front of his very own eyes, weltering in blood, Tangyi was certain his home has now gone, following Boss Tang to the sky.

 

Boss Tang has become one of the stars in his universe and Tangyi knows he will always watch him from the above. But there’s a time when everything was too much for him to handle; he broke down.

 

The ever so composed boss leader Tangyi, broke down in tears of agony just when the land of Taiwan was pouring with heavy rain. His sobs were covered with the droplets of crystal from the gray-looking clouds; he was too overwhelmed with everything and nothing at the same time.

 

It just hits him all at once; now, his home is incomplete again.

 

The warmth that Boss Tang had given to him for the past years has turned cold, almost frozen. His heart only beats because he is not destined to die yet. Tangyi has been living his life like a zombie, no longer even bother to think about having a home.

 

_Home_.

 

_Meng Shaofei_.

 

Meng Shaofei came into his life the moment his world has shattered fully to the ground and he could only watch it without doing anything to fix his broken universe.

 

He is annoying, he is contradictory, he is determined; everything about Meng Shaofei is aggravating.

 

But time after time, Shaofei’s usual loud and cheerful personality becomes endearing; Tangyi likes it. He fell for it. He really fell for Shaofei’s charms.

 

It scares him. Tangyi is scared of his own feelings because by now, he is imagining to build a home with Shaofei.

 

Meng Shaofei; a police officer who is so dedicated in his work, would be willing take a bullet for anyone, anywhere and anytime and has the lingering warmth that Tangyi once felt when Boss Tang was still with him.

 

Meng Shaofei exudes the exact warmth, even better, even deeper, more intense than Boss Tang has ever gave him.

 

Tangyi is afraid.

 

The closer Shaofei is to him, the more Tangyi is going out of his mind. He knows he isn’t suppose to feel this way towards the officer; they are from two different worlds, two different cosmos and Tangyi realized that, he really does.

 

And yet, their contrasting world is slowly colliding the moment Shaofei kissed him at the rooftop.

 

The broken pieces of his shattered world are now being glued back into a complete sphere. Shaofei has filled the emptiness in his heart. Meng Shaofei managed to do that with just his latency in Tangyi’s life.

 

But he doesn’t deserve Shaofei.

 

Shaofei was almost killed twice because of him. Shaofei has barely won the battle when he was in surgery and it was all because of protecting Tangyi and Xin Tian Meng. Tangyi was lucky because Shaofei once told him that __only a canon can kill me__ , and he is afraid if in their near future, someone might take Shaofei’s life for real.

 

His usual stoic expression, only Shaofei can see the layers that he tried so hard to hide. Only Shaofei can unfold those layers, bit by bit when their nights shared together in bed, limbs tangled and chest meeting chest, heartbeat all in sync.

 

__I_ don’t deserve you_, he once said to Shaofei. The look on Shaofei’s face was ridiculous, as if Tangyi has uttered something so gibberish, he couldn’t help but to smile. The only thing he received as a reply was a kiss on his lips, long and passionate, soft yet delicate and so Meng Shaofei.

 

Tangyi tried so hard to fight with his feelings, to fight the feeling of wanting to be with Shaofei, wanting Shaofei to always be with him because Shaofei is willing, Shaofei loves him.

 

_Shaofei loves him_.

 

He tried to cascade those blooming feelings away from his heart, but Shaofei is so tempting it’s almost impossible to resist him. It’s impossible.

 

The thing about Tangyi is, his mindset is he needs to push everyone away from his life so that they will not be the target, so that they will not be in danger. Tangyi is so used of pushing people far from his life, it has become a habit of him.

 

But Shaofei is the complete opposite.

 

Shaofei will always pull the ones he cherished and loved closer, embracing them and protecting them with his massive fighting skills and his trusty gun, feeling nothing but burning bravery and utter conviction.

 

_Don’t push me away Tangyi_ , Shaofei whispered to him that night, voice lovely and soft, as the lights in Shaofei’s room were dimmed and the blanket heavy on their cold bodies. _If you keep on pushing me, I’ll be pulling you in harder._

 

Tangyi has stopped pushing Shaofei out from his life. He is pulling him closer and closer into his life, into his world, into his little bubble.

 

But the moment Chen Wenhao is holding Shaofei as a hostage, Tangyi regretted his every decision.

 

He regretted on pulling Shaofei into his dark world, he resented his choices to let Shaofei dawdle in his life, but he doesn’t regret loving Shaofei.

 

He has never felt any anguish of loving Shaofei, because he gets to feel his warmth and basking in his essence with every fiber of his being.

 

In front of him, Meng Shaofei is covered in blood, his usual sparkling eyes are tired-looking and his lips, the ones Tangyi loves to kiss, are chapped and cut in every corner possible.

 

His whole body is soaked in blood, Tangyi can’t even see an inch of clean skin from the officer’s body.

 

His world is shattering once again.

 

“Meng Shaofei,” Tangyi breathed out so brokenly, and the latter looked up to him.

 

Shaofei is… _smiling_. A slight tug on his lips and Tangyi had missed that so much, so much that he is feeling guilty because of it.

 

“Tangyi, I see I’ve got the person you cherished the most.” Chen Wenhao said with such venom, his smile is any sorts of victory that makes the blood in Tangyi’s whole system boils.

 

“Let him go.” Tangyi said.

 

This is all because of his stubborness. If only he had listened to Shaofei’s words, if only he didn’t let his anger get the best of him, Shaofei won’t be in this position.

 

Tangyi is taking a step closer to Shaofei but the guards are holding him down, grounding him in their grasp. He is fighting with every flowing energy in his being but he was handcuffed almost immediately and he received a kick in his stomach.

 

Blood is spluttering from his mouth, but the pain he is feeling right now can never surpassed the pain of seeing Shaofei kneeling almost lifelessly on the ground.

 

“Chen Wenhao,” Tangyi said. “Let him go, __please__.” His words came out too desperately, too pleadingly because he knows Chen Wenhao is a devil and he will do things that is unimagineable to everyone.

 

He can hear Chen Wenhao is pulling the trigger. By the time his eyes meet the gangster, the gun is already directed at Shaofei’s head.

 

Shaofei is oddly relaxed in the gangster's hold, and a thought came crossing Tangyi’s mind; is Shaofei used to this kind of treatment? How many times did a gun was directed at him that makes him so… fearless?

 

“I believe I can’t let him go.” Chen Wenhao said. “I thought we are settling things just between us, but why is this officer meddles with our agreement? He,” Chen Wenhao pointed the gun at Shaofei’s forehead, “-deserves to die because of you.”

 

“CHEN WENHAO!” Tangyi exploded. No, please, his small heart whispered.

 

“T-Tang-y-yi…” Shaofei’s voice were ringing in his ears. The officer is looking at him, there’s that warm smile and the familiar glint in his eyes. Tangyi is afraid of the meaning behind it.

 

“I-I’m s-s-sor-ry…” The officer whispered, stuttering in his every words.

 

To witness the person he loves the most is at the verge of dying, it is making him crazy.

 

“Don’t apologize, Shaofei.” Tangyi said, by now, the tears he has been holding finally falls. “Don’t fucking apologize, Meng Shaofei.”

 

Tangyi is going nuts.

 

He struggled with the guard’s grip around his body as he kicks them hard and knock his forehead against theirs. The only thing he has in mind is to save Shaofei. He needs to save Shaofei.

 

“Meng Shaofei!”

 

_Bang!_

_Bang!_

_Bang!_

 

Tangyi’s world darkens instantly as the sound of gunshots are too deafening and too overpowering.

 

 

***

 

 

The smell of anaesthetic is too overwhelming, but Tangyi has grown used to it by now.

 

Chen Wenhao was killed as soon as he pulled the trigger and shot Shaofei on the chest twice. The police arrived just in time before Tangyi could even reach for the gun and shoot Chen Wenhao with his own bare hands.

 

But he knows that Shaofei will be mad at him if he did.

 

Shaofei’s limp body was in his hands when the ambulance came. He had lost so much blood, he had to undergo surgery again but this time it’s more severe. The bullet had almost pass through his heart, and the other was just below his abdomen, close to his liver.

 

Shaofei wouldn’t have make it if they were a minute late.

 

He is still in the operating room, 12 hours has passed but Tangyi doesn’t mind waiting. He doesn’t mind waiting for Shaofei to wake up again.

 

At the 13th hour, Doctor Jiang appeared from the closed doors with blood covering his white coat.

 

“Jiang, how’s Shaofei?” Tangyi asked, his eyes are swollen from the tears.

 

“He’s stable.” Doctor Jiang broke the news. The feeling of calmness has finally settling into his body.

 

It’s more than enough.

 

Shaofei’s still breathing is more than enough for Tangyi.

 

 

***

 

 

The first time Tangyi sees Shaofei on bed, lying with his eyes closed was when his right arm was slashed with a knife. The second time was when he was shot in the abdomen while trying to save Hongye.

 

This is the third time.

 

And Shaofei really looks like a living corpse.

 

His usual fluffy cheeks are now shrunken, the usual color on his skin is fading, the pink on his plump lips disappeared, but still, Shaofei is so beautiful.

 

He was asleep for the past two days, the accident really taking its toll on Shaofei’s body. But Tangyi is always there, waiting for him to open his eyes.

 

And Shaofei did.

 

As soon as his eyes are open, he is smiling at Tangyi.

 

“Tangyi…” He softly called, his voice hoarse and coarse from not using it for a while.

 

This time, Tangyi doesn’t even bother to wipe his tears.

 

“Meng Shaofei.” Tangyi whispered back.

 

“What did I tell you? Only a canon can kill me.” Shaofei whispered, chuckling lightly, just enough to light Tangyi’s world again.

 

Tangyi snorted as a response. Even when he is hurting, Shaofei is always sensitive with his emotions. Shaofei will always try to cheer him up whenever he is feeling down or remorse; surely, Tangyi is now convinced that Shaofei is an angel.

 

“Tangyi, I’m sorry.”

 

“Why are you apologizing?”

 

“I should’ve told you about my plans. I wanted to settle Chen Wenhao for you, I won’t let you perform any illegal punishment on him. As a police officer, I have to do it.” Shaofei explained.

 

“I know.” Tangyi nodded while reaching for Shaofei’s hands. They are cold, but still so homey. “I understand.” Tangyi said.

 

They fall into a comfortable silence.

 

“I almost lost you, Shaofei.” Tangyi said. He kisses Shaofei’s bandaged knuckles, tasting the fabric rough on his lips and not the usual soft skin of Shaofei.

 

“But you won’t lose me Tangyi. I had promised to be with you in your every birthday.” Shaofei replied, smiling ever so gracefully with eyes so honest that makes something in Tangyi’s chest tightens into an unbreakable knot.

 

“I’ll never leave you Tangyi. Never.”

 

If it’s anyone else, Tangyi will never believe it. But those words are coming from Shaofei, and Tangyi believes it. He has to believe it.

 

Tangyi can only give Shaofei a smile, the tears are wetting his face but it’s okay, only with Shaofei will he let his guard down.

 

The emptiness in his heart, Shaofei is filling it all with his overflowing love for Tangyi.

 

Tangyi, who has once lost faith in the word home, has now become a front believer of it.

 

Shaofei is his home.

 

Shaofei is the person who he wants to hug, to kiss and to cherish whenever and however. Shaofei is the person he wants to come home to.

 

In this life, he is afraid of letting people into his world. He is afraid if his home will be taken away from him once again.

 

But Shaofei makes him realize that he has nothing to be afraid of.

 

Because Shaofei makes him believe that he deserves a home.

 

A home, a sanctuary, a paradise, where Tangyi and Meng Shaofei will live happily together.

**Author's Note:**

> i'm sorry for all the errors. english is not my first language, therefore, errors are everywhere. i'd been feeling a lot of things for tangfei lately and here is my kind of way to interpret the feelings i have for them.
> 
> i'm sorry again for everything!


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